You’ll never guess what I found…

I got an oil change and a haircut today; I’m a brand new man. That is about as exciting as things got, as I’m at my moms house deep in the mountains visiting her. It’s weird to see things from my childhood; I don’t think my mom throws any thing out. I was digging through a box and surprisingly enough found my umbilical cord, ok that didn’t happen.

They are starting to save umbilical cords now for various medical reasons. But I could think of some better non medical uses of this birth time throw away.

Top 5 uses of the umbilical cord

5: Connect your Nunchuks, finally you have an environmentally friendly option besides chain or rope.

4: An improvised lasso, in case your regular lasso is in the shop or not available.

3: A work out elastic band. You’ve seen these devices on infomercials or perhaps in the gym, well now you have your own and the resistance is set at least a fraction higher then your exact birth weight.

2: Sausage holder. Finally you have a sleek designed carrying case for your sausages, no more need to carry them in your pocket like loose change.

1: Emergency weather stripping on your car. Have you ever been on a long commute when you start to hear the wind come in through the crack between the door. Stuff the cord in that crack and problem solved, a temporary but effective fix.

What would you do with your umbilical cord?

JU